Doofus Of The Day #1,087


It’s been a while since we’ve had a Doofus to report.  However, this Florida man makes up for the shortfall – and then some!

What do you do if you leave a bar in the early morning hours of a Saturday and can’t find your car? The correct answer is, “Good thing you couldn’t find it, you should definitely call a cab.” But police in Port St. Lucie, Fla., say that a Florida man’s answer to the problem of his missing car was to steal another car to go looking for it.

. . .

The man told deputies that while on his quest, he had to jump from the stolen car after he got it stuck on railroad tracks — and seconds before a train smashed into it and sent it flying into a house.

The homeowners, who were asleep, were unharmed. But “the explosive sound of a driverless car smashing into the side of their home was clearly jolting,” the sheriff’s office said.

Back on foot after the car-train crash, deputies say the man then attempted to steal a forklift from a nearby fruit stand, which he also vandalized. But a forklift will only take you so far, so he then flagged down deputies responding to this series of events “to let them know he was still looking for his car.” Rather than lend a hand in the search, deputies arrested him.

There’s more at the link, including a couple of photographs of what was left of the car after it had been drop-kicked into the house by the train.

I don’t know what he was drinking before all this went down, but if it gave him that sort of inspiration, I want to stay far, far away from it!!!



  1. "It's been a while since we've had a Doofus to report." Surely this is a thing of which there is no shortage. We make plenty right here.

  2. This guy is one of the reasons I dont ride my bike around port st. Lucie. We winter over in Florida but when visiting PSL to see family, I leave my bike back in Okeechobee.

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