In honor of the occasion (and in view of the Jewish Buddhist post immediately below this one), I decided to give you a few sayings from well-known Jewish mothers.
(Actually, only two of them [as far as I know] were Jewish, but this is what a Jewish mother in their position would have said!)
CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS’ JEWISH MOTHER: “I don’t care what you’ve discovered, you still should have written!”
THOMAS EDISON’S JEWISH MOTHER: “Of course I’m proud that you invented the electric light bulb. Now turn it off and go to sleep!”
ALBERT EINSTEIN’S JEWISH MOTHER: “But it’s your senior photograph! Couldn’t you have done something about your hair?”
ABRAHAM LINCOLN’S JEWISH MOTHER: “Again with the hat! Why can’t you wear a baseball cap like the other kids?”
MONA LISA’S JEWISH MOTHER: “This you call a smile, after all the money your father and I spent on braces?”
MICHELANGELO’S JEWISH MOTHER: “Why can’t you paint on walls like other children? Do you know how hard it is to get this junk off the ceiling?”
MOSES’ JEWISH MOTHER: “That’s a good story! Now tell me where you’ve really been for the last forty years.”
NAPOLEON’S JEWISH MOTHER: “All right, if you’re not hiding your report card inside your jacket, take your hand out of there and show me!”
PAUL REVERE’S JEWISH MOTHER: “I don’t care where you think you have to go, young man, midnightis long past your curfew!”
GEORGE WASHINGTON’S JEWISH MOTHER: “Next time I catch you throwing money across thePotomac, you can kiss your allowance goodbye!”
And with that, a happy day to all the mothers out there!
Peter