1. Immaturity comes to mind. But then, it is the tech industry, where ping-pong table playing, basket ball hoops and ratty human attire are the norm in the office.

  2. I've seen two reasons for non-conforming job titles in Silicon Valley. One was to retain, or hire, someone that was needed or wanted for a dept that did not have an active slot for a warm body. The second, and often tied to number one, was to open up the ability to offer more money to that person than the job codes allowed.

    They didn't use to be so creatively named!

  3. Go look up 'director of diversity and inclusion'. It's sickening! I can't believe private and public institutions are paying these positions at least six figures. Naturally, these positions add zero economic value.

  4. I've used the Database Janitor title. Also Data Sanitation Engineer. My favorite is Digital Archeologist.

  5. A couple of years ago, one of the largest medical device manufacturers in the world changed its name from "…Medical Systems" to "…Healthineers"

    Yep, it's true. Google it if you don't believe me.

  6. I nearly became a Cybernetic Entomologist except the HR weenie at the company I worked for at the time checked a dictionary and forbade it. The title was my joke (well mine and my boss') but it was also entirely accurate.

    I believe there are a number of (mostly start-up) companies who allow employees the freedom to create their own whimsical job titles because "senior software test engineer" or whatever is very corporate like and exactly what people who join small start-ups don't want.

    It gets horribly pretentious when the whimsical titles are imposed from above though

  7. Well, I think all's clear when you remember the scene from Snatch:
    "So, what should I call you? Bullet…? Tooth…?"
    "You can call me Susan if you pay…"

  8. My successor was named "Chief Digital Transformation Officer". Since this was in academia, I'm guessing the binary nature of technology needed to be changed to allow for the 167 other values that could exist.

    He didn't make it two years. To date, at roughly 4.5 years, I'm the longest serving IT head the place has ever had. I was simply the Director of Information Technology. There may be a scientific study to be had here….

  9. Not exactly Tech, but at the airline I worked for I suspected things were going down the drain when the monthly newsletter proudly announced the hiring of an 'Assistant Can-Do Officer' The place folded shortly after 9/11.

  10. "Happiness Engineer" – Sex toy designer?
    "Full Stack Magician" – One who can produce loaded magazines at will?

  11. Just got hired by an outfit that has a First Impressions Specialist. She seems nice, although she said my name was confusing.

    My previous employer folded 7 weeks after hiring me. Coincidence?

Leave a comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *